Happy First Birthday Abigail Lila!

My sweet baby girl is ONE! I've set this to post at exactly the time she was born because unlike a year ago, I plan to be asleep at 1:56 a.m.! I can't believe what an amazing year it has been with this amazing little girl. In honor of that day, I've decided to (finally) share her birth story in addition to some photos of our life one year ago today. Enjoy!

The story of Abby's birth is lengthy, so feel free to skim or skip! I just know there are a few of you out there that will enjoy reading the recap. :)

On Friday night, April 24th 2009, Ryan joined the guys from our small group for an overnight guys’ retreat of sorts. Three of the couples in our group were expecting babies within the next three months, including us. Our baby girl was due May 3rd, and I had told Ryan I’d like him to do something like this with the guys before she arrived, because it was likely going to be a long time before I would want him to do it again! I was a little nervous about him being gone overnight so close to my due date, but the house where he would stay was just an 8 minute drive from ours. With his promise to keep his phone on and near him, and several of the other guys’ phone numbers programmed into my phone, I agreed. That night as I lay on the couch watching a chick flick that would have been torture for my dear husband, I began having contractions. They were mild and far apart, so I wasn’t worried. After about an hour I started timing them, because they seemed to be fairly regular. They were, indeed, regular, but still very far apart and mild. This went on for about three hours before stopping, and I went to bed.

On Saturday morning Ryan came home just in time for me leave for a Mary Kay party and luncheon that I had planned with some girlfriends. It had worked out well for Ryan to have some guy time and me to have some girl time just before our baby was due. I headed out and had a great couple of hours with the girls, eating a yummy lunch and trying on lots of fun make-up. That afternoon while Eli napped, Ryan headed outside to do some yard work and I sat down at the computer to write out care instructions for Eli. Ryan’s parents would be staying with him while we were in the hospital delivering Abigail. As I sat at the computer trying to record instructions for every possible scenario they might encounter while we were gone, I began feeling contractions again. Similar to Friday night, they were mild and far apart. It wasn’t long, however, before I realized that the contractions were definitely getting stronger and closer together. I decided to start timing, just to have a reference point; when I began timing, my contractions were already five minutes apart! I went outside and told Ryan that there was a possibility I was going into labor. By this time Eli was awake and I brought him outside so we could all enjoy the lovely spring afternoon. My contractions were varying between three and five minutes apart, and definitely getting stronger. I began walking around the backyard to see if anything would change, but nothing did. I finally called the hospital to get some advice on when to come in. I was really at a loss as to how to proceed since my water broke before contractions started when Eli was born. This time it was all about figuring out how long to wait and not wanting to get to the hospital only to be told to return home for awhile longer. I spoke with the charge nurse in the maternity wing and she said that it was really up to me to decide how long I wanted to labor at home. She believed that I’d definitely be coming in to deliver sometime that evening, but that I needed to gauge for myself how long to wait. At about 5:30 we called Ryan’s parents and asked them to come over. They had just finished dinner in Seattle and needed to go home for their bags first. When they arrived at about 7:00, there was no question that we needed to be on our way! My contractions were just three minutes apart by this time, and so intense that I could no longer talk through them. We gave Eli lots of hugs and kisses and headed to the hospital. While Ryan drove I focused on my breathing, and Ryan focused on getting to the hospital as quickly as possible. He later told me that he drove well over the speed limit and was a little worried that we weren’t going to make it in time! We arrived at the hospital at 7:45 and made it to the intake desk of the maternity wing just as a big contraction hit. Ryan looked at the charge nurse and said, “My wife is in labor.” She smiled and said, “Yes, I can see that!” We were taken to triage for an assessment, and I was very disappointed to learn that I was only about two centimeters dilated. They admitted me anyway because of the frequency and intensity of my contractions. As soon as we settled into our room I opted to begin walking the halls, though a part of my wanted to just curl up in the bed because I was really chilly. I hadn’t made any hard and fast decisions as to whether or not I would have an epidural, but I hoped that this being a second child would make delivery easier and that I wouldn’t feel the need for the drugs. I hoped that walking would lessen the intensity of the pain, but it did not. After a few laps I was more than a little bit chilly, couldn’t walk or talk through the contractions and decided to ask for the epidural, so we headed back to my room. The nurse sent for the anesthesiologist and brought me some warm blankets. The anesthesiologist arrived and began the procedure. I don’t know what the difference was, but the process that had truly been a breeze with Eli was terribly painful this time. I began to cry, and this combined with my shivering made it very difficult to be still, which is of the utmost importance when receiving an epidural. Finally, after what seemed like an age, it was complete and the medication began to take effect. The pain of the contractions lessened, but my shivering increased and I was absolutely freezing. The nurse brought in more warm blankets, covering my body and head. At some point I was struck by the fact that this was remarkably different from my first birthing experience. When giving birth to Eli I had kept praise and worship music playing the entire day and evening. After getting my epidural Ryan and I even watched 24 on t.v. This time, however, I wanted no music, no television, just quiet and dark. And I was still freezing. The part of the experience that was similar was the slow progression. I was disappointed by it even more this time, because birthing second children is supposed to be so much quicker and easier than first.

Finally, at quarter after one on Sunday morning, it was time to push. When I started, I counted each push, thinking I was going to have one of those great stories about pushing just three times before having a baby in my arms. I stopped counting at eleven. I became discouraged as I watched time pass on the clock, and was almost despondent when I felt Abby descend with each push only to return to her original position between contractions. It was a sensation I never experienced with Eli, and I really wanted to just give up. After two contractions of feeling her unmistakably move back up the birth canal, I decided to give every ounce of my strength for just one more push. If she didn’t come out with that, they were just going to have to perform a C-section! The time came, and I mustered every ounce of strength I could from every inch of my body and POP! After 11 hours of labor and 40 minutes of pushing, Abigail Lila was born at 1:56 a.m.! There was literally an audible pop, and as my doctor caught my daughter she exclaimed, “Oh my gosh, she was face up! No wonder that was so hard; I can’t believe you pushed her out!” No one had any idea that Abigail was in a posterior position (face up) because though the progression had been slow, my labor had indeed progressed. Typically posterior positioned babies are delivered via C-section because they are not able to descend through the birth canal in this position. My doctor said that had this been my first delivery, I certainly would not have been able to push her out. Unfortunately, being born face up allowed amniotic fluid and miconium to enter her lungs. I was able to hold my sweet girl for just a moment before the NICU nurses had to take her to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit to vacuum her lungs and wait for her to become responsive. Ryan asked me if I wanted him to stay with me or go with Abigail, and I asked him to go. Little did I know that I wasn’t in the best shape either. Just after my dear husband and new baby left the room, my shivers escalated to an uncontrollable shaking. I was still freezing and crying, and my nurse went to fetch some fresh warm blankets for me. While she was out of the room I began vomiting. My sweet nurse felt awful when she returned to find me shaking, shivering, and crying in the midst of vomit all over my bed. It was horrible. I was miserable. I wanted to feel normal and I wanted to be holding my healthy baby girl, and none of that was happening. The nurses cleaned me up, changed my bedding, and covered me again with warm blankets. Ryan returned to check on me and give me an update on Abby; she was breathing fine and becoming more responsive. They just needed to keep her a little longer for observation, so I asked him to go back to the NICU to be with her. During the hour that Ryan and Abby were in the NICU, my nurses discovered that I was hemorrhaging (delivering a posterior baby had done some damage to both of us, it seemed) and began a regimen of anti-hemorrhaging medication. By the time Abby and Ryan returned, I was finally starting to feel better. I think having my baby back in my arms made a world of difference! Over the next several hours the nurses continued to monitor Abby’s vitals and check her lungs, all of which continued to look fine.

After breakfast, Ryan’s parents brought Eli to the hospital to meet his baby sister. He was a little unsure when he first arrived, but after checking in with both Ryan and me to make sure that his status in the family hadn’t changed, he warmed up. We have some truly precious photos of him in those first moments of being a big brother. By mid-afternoon we were itching to get out of the hospital. Typically families remain in the maternity center for 24 hours after birth, but we started asking around if there were strings that could be pulled. I don’t sleep well in any bed but my own, and we really wanted to get our new baby home and begin our life as a family of four. We were blessed by two doctors who were willing to listen to our needs and bend the rules, and we were released at 8 p.m. Ryan’s parents brought Eli to the hospital again so that the three of us could bring our new baby home together. It was such a beautiful time for our family! We all gathered on Ryan’s and my bed and had some great “getting to know you” time together. It was a beautiful, blessed, and wonderful day, and the beginning of a beautiful, blessed, and wonderful life as a family of four!